I think for me one of the hardest things in pregnancy is dealing with all the changes your body goes through. Not only do your hormones completely mess with your head but so does everything else that goes on. It’s a lot to take in and process and it’s definitely not any easier the second time around, if anything I think I’m finding it harder.
I think the female body is absolutely amazing and everytime I see someone who is pregnant I think they look amazing, no matter how much weight they feel they’ve put on. This is something I really struggle to feel in myself though. It’s not about how big or small I am it’s just the way I feel when I’m pregnant and to be totally honest it’s not great at all. I have such low self confidence during pregnancy and it’s something I really can’t get my head around. I drive everyone around me crazy putting myself down and I can totally understand why. When I hear other people doing it I think ‘are you actually serious?’ but for me I just don’t enjoy the process at all which is pretty upsetting. I know I’m so lucky to be able to carry my children and it’s not something I would ever change but it’s something I find really difficult to get used to. Once I had Otis I’d look back and think I looked great why was I ever down, everyone was right, but now I’m feeling exactly the same as I did and I really can’t help it. Every outfit I try on I think I look huge but of course I’m bigger than I was, I’m carrying a child?? I’m not sure why that doesn’t register with me. I think what it comes down too is feeling out of control of my body and not feeling like myself when I look in the mirror. I’m blamimg my hormones!!
My body is changing for something amazing to happen and it’s such an incredible experience. All I want to do is enjoy it and embrace it but for some reason all I seem to be doing is moaning. I’m really trying my best from this moment forward to stop caring so much about how much weight I’m gaining or how big I’m looking and try to enjoy my final months of pregnancy. I wanted to share this with you all as I know lots of people look at others instagram accounts and think everything is perfect, but really everyone is facing there own little demons and that’s really normal.
Lots of love, Hattie xx